Showing posts with label beauty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label beauty. Show all posts

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Oh, LIFE

I just need to document some recent wonkiness:
· Some people I know are upset about something so they decided to create a new email account to have their Secret Angry Discussion. They chose to set up a Yahoo email account. I find that hilarious.
· I watched this short film about women’s bodies after birth, thought about my own issues with my post-baby body and ended up crying at my desk. Yay!
· Student asked to sing at this year’s commencement ceremony and I had to tell her no and she thinks it’s personal and it’s not. It’s logistical. Like Honey Badger, She Really Doesn’t Give A Shit.
· Rude faculty is rude. Again. This time I stood up for myself (professionally and politely, but firmly). I’m so thankful to have a boss who supports me when this stuff goes down.
· Program Chair insists that I am a notary. He is so certain! Nope, I’m not. No, really. I’m not. I’m also not a secretary (a term he is still using) and can I say, President Obama, that I loved your SOTU but why are you still calling people secretaries? I get that it was probably easier to say than “Administrative Assistant” but dude you just gave a bazillion old school executives ammo in their argument with their ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT that they should be able to still call them secretaries.
· Forgot a bowl at home (again) so warmed up my chicken noodle soup in cups . . . and then, in my attempt to transfer the broth of one cup to another, poured it into my coffee.
· I wish my husband didn’t hate social media, he’d be an amazing live-tweeter. You should have heard him during the State Of The Union.
· Today’s post on Handmade Ryan Gosling is super popular. Clearly, crafty ladies of the world like to be told we’re sexy even though we haven’t showered in a couple days.

· Last but surely not least: Downton Abbey tumblrs for you!
o Downton Abbeyonce
o Downton Abbey Lamps
o Arrested Downton
o Downton Pawnee
o Downton A Train

Monday, November 28, 2011

Chop Chop!

Ok, y’all, here’s a few pics of me and mah hurr.

ash ashnyc

earrings

 

 

 

 

 

It’s about the length of the first photo, except the layers are mostly non-existent at this point so I’ve got a lot of triangle-head action going on. Time for a cut! Friends have coined the term “going A-Ray on yourself” from me cutting my own hair. It comes out cute about 75% of the time and I’ve done it for years, only making it to a real salon once a year or so.

I’m going to the salon for my next cut because I don’t want feel like messing with it, and I found a great lady at Hair Cuttery so it’s all kinds of inexpensive.

This is what I’ll be going for – actually very similar to the cut in the middle pic above, but no bangs, stacked in the back and maybe even a little asymmetry! For the last couple of years I was working on growing my hair out, but that just never turns out pretty, so I finally gave it up with my last cut, and now want to go even shorter. Especially during the winter, I love a short ‘do because it’s easy to straighten, and straight hair (for me) doesn’t get very messed up under winter hats, the way curly hair does (for me).

ashstraight Me with short, straight hair. It starts out way straight but curls at the ends, always. My hair straightens very easily (yay!) but also reverts back to curls with even invisible amounts of moisture, like the amount that’s on your hands just by . . . being alive.

My hair doesn’t have the same curl featured in the pics below – my curl is more spiraled and tight, especially when short – but the basic cut and shape is what I’m after.

When I actually get around to having it done, I’ll share pics with you so you can ooh and ahh. Please ooh and ahh. Don’t tell me if it’s ugly!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Adam Braverman Saves the Day

On last night's episode of NBC's Parenthood, there was a scene that gave me happy chills. I was sitting there with my hand up over my mouth, on the edge of the couch, staring at Adam Braverman (Peter Krause's character) with such love . . . ;)

See, in the show, Adam and his wife Kristina recently had a baby - a very unplanned baby. They already have a teenager and a younger son. Adam and his brother just bought an old recording studio and are trying to turn it into a profitable one. They also hired an assistant who is super crazy young and SMOKING hot.

Kristina is dealing with the I Just Had A Baby And Feel So Incredibly Not Hot And Self Concious stage that most women go through during the weeks & months after giving birth. It takes quite a while for the body to "bounce back" to its old self, and the truth (sorry, y'all) is that for most women, it never does bounce all the way back. Especially after having more than one kid. On top of all that, your body's hormones are still trying to regulate themselves, so your emotions are just all over the place and heightened. You feel gross and your body is healing from birth, so even if the Dr. has given the ok to have sex again, you may not feel ready. You might be scared of pain, of not being attractive, of not enjoying it. Your hormones are trying to tell you "Slow down, you just had a baby" so you may not even be interested in sex. Still, sex is important for most relationships so going weeks and months without it can strain the relationship. And it's like - your husband is giving you space because he knows you're not ready yet, but the fact that they aren't trying to get it on makes you feel like you're not desirable.

It's a tough time to be a chick, I'm telling you. I've been through it 3 times. I remember one day on maternity leave after our last child was born, watching something on tv that prompted me to go look in the full-length mirror. My husband came home and I was sobbing on the couch about how horrible I looked and how I was never going to be hot again and, well, he had to do a lot of encouraging so I wouldn't totally lose it.

So in the scene below, Adam's recording studio is having a big launch party. Kristina is in the red dress, the smoking hot assistant is in the black jacket, and Adam is the guy who totally blew me away with how sweet and loving and real he is when talking to Kristina.

Sigh.

Watch it and sigh with me.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Hard Truths Aren’t True, Just Hard To Read Without Putting My Fist Through A Wall

psychology today Psychology Today recently published an article written by Dr. Satoshi Kanazawa, an “evolutionary psychologist” and regular contributor to PT via his blog-space there, “The Scientific Fundamentalist: A Look at the Hard Truths About Human Nature”.

Kanazawa’s article was titled, “Why Are Black Women Less Physically Attractive Than Other Women?”

Someone on Twitter brought my attention to the article and I read it, getting more upset the more I read. The article is no longer accessible on the PT website but you can read it in its entirety here.

The article basics: Research indicates that we think Black men are more attractive than other men, but we think Black women are less attractive than other women.

I now have a copy of the article from someone who had the foresight to copy/paste it into a Word doc, but I did get to read it all the way through before it was taken off the site. The only reference to the research done to stake these claims is the mention of the “Add Health” survey taken by respondents (men and women) in three stages. It says that respondents were surveyed three times, with the same questions each time. There is no link to what Add Health is and there is no other information provided in the article about who administered the survey, who these men & women are, how many there were, what races, ethnicities, ages, etc. they were, or what questions were asked.

I Googled, “Psychology Today Add Health” and then “Add Health” and found a few different results that pointed to “Add Health” being a shortened name for a major study. The National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health interviewed over 20,000 teens and over 17,000 of their parents about many things, however, the survey is considered to be in general, about sexuality. Beginning in the mid 1990s, teens in the United States were surveyed, then a few years later were surveyed again (though surveyors weren’t able to find the entire original sample group), then a few years later surveyed again. The study reports its findings from the entire six year period.

Having read this far, you might think, ok . . . so what? A poorly referenced article tells us that according to a major U.S. study, teens and their parents think Black women aren’t as attractive as other women. That really sucks.

And?

Here’s the “and”: MY BAD, the language of the article doesn’t actually say that people think Black women are less attractive. It flat out says, Black women ARE less attractive. For example, it says,

“It is very interesting to note that, even though black women are objectively less physically attractive than other women, black women (and men) subjectively consider themselves to be far more physically attractive than others.”

It also states that there are differences in intelligence, based on race:

“Nor can the race difference in intelligence (and the positive association between intelligence and physical attractiveness) account for the race difference in physical attractiveness among women.”

Bell Curve, anyone?

It gets worse. This article states opinion as though it were fact and it misuses and mis-states the results of research undergone for other purposes . . . but it also is operating under the premise that the European standard of beauty is the standard that all should be judged by. That photo up at the top? That’s the image that PT ran with this article. The findings that Americans think Black women are the least attractive of all the races? Sad and disgusting, but indicative of our accepted and perpetuated standard of beauty. Guess which race has features that consistently do NOT fit inside the measurements of that photo? And guess which race does?

Though the accepted cultural belief that Black women aren’t beautiful – are actually LEAST beautiful - is very sad, it’s not shocking to me. What IS shocking (Wait, why? Why is it shocking?) is that an enormous publication like Psychology Today would publish this crap. You know, it would have been one thing if they’d published the findings and said, “Man, we have work to do! We all know beauty is subjective and these results point to some serious problems in our society’s perception of beauty. What can we as psychologists and mental health professionals do to combat this?” But no – they published an article that had ZERO links to references, stating that Black women ARE less attractive than other women. Period.

Did you know that people of color (POC) are largely under-represented in the field of psychology? I work with psychologists and people studying to become psychologists – I see the anecdotal evidence to this five days a week. Guess where else POC are under-represented? In receiving care for their mental health. And of those who do receive care? They are usually treated by someone who is White.

That editors at Psychology Today saw this article as fit to publish boggles my mind. We have GOT to do better.

Here are some more great takes on this article:

Kristen Howerton from Rage Against the Minivan (includes 2 great videos and a comment from me! ha)

Racialicious (includes awesome graph and snippets of blogs from all over)

Confessions of a Cybernegress (last sentence packs a punch. So true!)

Kristen Howerton again – thoughts on the way Twitter was used to call out Psychology Today

And here is a letter from another author published on Psychology Today . . . Hmm . . . should they be off the hook?

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